She's not just lying, she's a liar.

Basics to remember:

A choice between the lesser of two evils is still an evil choice.
A nymphomaniac is still a maniac.
Good grammar does not suffice for good manners.
There's no good excuse for bad behavior.
It's only a bargain if you need it.

Eat half of what is served to you.

Diversify.

Visit more local towns. Buy more local crafts.

Read The Power of Loving Your Church before accepting the call to ministry.

Keep more than just a couple pictures.

Hardcopy everything.

More smoke.

Scars last forever. (note to surfer: I mean real scars. I am NOT speaking of some metaphorical emotional or spiritual scar. I'm talking about the scars one gets when one gets cut by a very sharp knife.)

Write more notes telling people you are thinking about them (in a positive way).

Negative responses out-number positive responses ten to one. But you knew that.

Dull people who care are more valuable than smart people who don't.

It's all about. . . . well, now this is going to take some explaning.

Note to self: In your darkest hour, people will tell you about how great God's grace is and that He sees all sin as the same. (And they'll probably use that New York City anaology because that's what they heard in Sunday School class.) While those people are saying that, they are actually just prefacing an attack on you about how "in human terms" your sin is worse than theirs because of the far-reaching impact it has had. In all of this, they will totally neglect to address the misery, meanness, and medicority that their sin has ushered into the world for a lifetime. Through all of this remember that "perception is reality" for those who can't perceive what is real!

The only people who ever told me a lie were the people who told me they were telling me the truth.

Negativity wins. (Negativity wins because people work harder at it.)

Carve away from yourself and go with the grain.

Inject the ribs with something less spicy.

Pay more attention to the dialation of the pupil when talking to people.

Wake up hopeful. Go to bed satisfied.